Well, it’s now been around 160 or so days since our Esteamed Lowliness has been installed, and we have been slowly been having to become accustomed to the new phenomenon known as Obamazombies. These are the people who have had their brains eaten, (especially the logic centers), and now seek to transform the rest of us into, well, them. A horrifying thought, I know- having these creatures seeking real brains is somewhat unsettling- for them a mental time- out is forever, and they just keep mindlessly coming, senselessly groping for meaning in their lives.
In truth, zombies should be boring. There are only so many things you can do with them, narratively speaking. They can’t charm you, like vampires, or make you pity them as they relate their torment while in human form, like werewolves. They clumsily lope after you, hoping to feast on your flesh, and they have almost no personality as individuals. Instead, zombie mobs are just an undifferentiated mass of malevolence. What’s remarkable is that a villain with such little complexity has thrived for so long.
prospect.org
In the movies, the characters who still have brains and want to keep them must shoot the zombies in the head, which makes little sense, but that’s the movies- in real life, we must suffer these mindless fools as they try to subvert common sense and the Constitution (Apparently they have a taste for old documents that speak of personal freedoms). It seems when someone mentions “rights” that single word attracts these rigid, humorless government- control freaks as they try to destroy the logic others espouse.
It’s true that fighting off the zombie horde requires plentiful firearms, no doubt pleasing Second Amendment advocates. And in a zombie movie, government tends to be either ineffectual or completely absent. On the other hand, when the zombie apocalypse comes, capitalism breaks down, too — people aren’t going to be exchanging money for goods and services; they’re just going to break into the hardware store and grab what they need (and if you think your private health insurer is going to be paying claims for treatment of zombie bites, you’re living in a dream world).
prospect.org
We are just going to have to keep up the good fight against these Obamazombies- they are legion, and they are hungry for our brains. This is obvious from the actions they have taken in government lately, We, as the only people left unaffected by this disease, have an obligation to try and find a cure for this inhuman form of possession- nearly 20% of the population has been affected totally, and there’s some others that have begun to succumb.
There is good news- we do not have to shoot these zombies in the head- there’s a better way. Elections in 2010 can begin to turn the tide against this horrifying trend of brainless, soul- sucking people.
We can do it- for the good of this country, we must turn the tide of zombie-ism.
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