- Big Dogs Weblog - https://www.onebigdog.net -

All Aboard! Time to Put Up or Shut Up

Well, well, well. The libs are out in full force because they lost the election. I seem to remember that a bunch of them said they were going to leave the country if GWB won again. He won so start packing. Here is you invitation:

Subject: Cruise ship opportunity!
A Great Carnival Cruise Offer
We at Carnival Cruise Lines didn’t forget that a lot of entertainers had
promised to leave the country if George W.Bush were to be re-elected
President.

With that in mind, we have a Special Offer for those who still want to keep
their promise!

Attention: Would Alec Baldwin, Rosie O’Donnell and her wife, Ed Asner,
Janeane Garafalo, Whoppi Goldberg, Al Franken, Michael Moore and his
personal groomer, Cher and her vocal therapist, Phil Donahue, Rob
Reiner(apparently still a “meathead”), Barbara Streisand (who has a nose for
these outcomes), Jane Fonda, as well as the entire staffs of the LA and NY
Times and anyone else who made that promise, please dispose of all US assets
and report to Florida for the sailing of the Funship Cruise, “Elation,”
which has been commissioned to take you to your new vacation homes in
Afghanistan.

You may opt to be dropped off in Somalia or Iraq.

The Florida Supreme Court will sponsor a Farewell Parade in your honor
through Palm Beach, Broward, and Miami-Dade counties prior to your cruise.
Please pack for an extended stay… at least four more years.
Note: Since you advocate strict gun control, you may not bring any, but then
with Jane Fonda along you won’t need any.

Staffing your voyage is Bill Clinton as captain, Al Gore as cruise director,
Gray Davis as Entertainment Director, Purser Terry Heinz Kerry hopefully
will be kept somewhere below decks away from the media.

Monica Lewinsky as the “Cigar and Cigarette Girl”,
Entertainment by the Dixie Chicks and Bruce Springsteen, and John Kerry will
be our Life Guard in consideration of his past experience in pulling people
out of the water. (Unless he decides at the last minute not to go). He is
advocating the elimination of the game “shuffleboard” in favor of his new
game he calls “waffleboard”. Be sure to pack your flip flops as you will
need them!! while playing.

Ted Kennedy will double as Bartender and Director of Emergency Procedures
and as a buoy as required.

Rev. Al Sharpton will provide inspirational services, and Ex-Congressman
Gary Condit as intern coordinator.

If you have any questions about making arrangements for your homes, friends
and loved ones, please direct your comments to Senator Hillary Clinton. Her
village, paid for by the United States, can raise your children while you’re
gone, and she can watch over all your money and your furnishings until you
return.

“Bon Voyage!!!”

Is this a great country or what? It’s called Freedom of Speech.