The Finger Told the Tale

Yes, we here a Big Dog’s Weblog knew it was only a matter of time before authorities arrested Anna Ayala (as did any rational adult with at least average intelligence). Last month, Ayala claimed she had bitten down on a finger that came out of her Wendy’s chili. However, no one at Wendy’s or their suppliers was missing a digit. You don’t have to have a degree in Rocket Science to know she had been caught in her own web of deceit. Greed fells even the smartest scam artists — although Ayala certainly can’t claim that ranking.

Quickly, she tried to drop the suit hoping Wendy’s would also let the matter go. The authorities would have none of it. They pursued the case with due diligence and used all the tools at their disposal to indict Ayala on attempted grand larceny. At today’s press conference, they refused to divulge the probable origin of the finger or any supporting evidence. Guess we will have to wait for the trial to expose the gruesome details. They have also charged Ayala with grand larceny stemming from her attempt to sell a mobile home that she did not own. Imagine my surprise!

It was apparent that the franchise and the blameless employees would suffer the biggest losses because of this fraudulent claim. Sure enough, Northern California Wendy’s franchises have lost $2.5 million in the last 31 days, according to police at today’s press conference. Joseph Desmond, owner of the local Wendy’s franchises, called the incident a “nightmare.”

”It’s been 31 days, and believe me it’s been really tough,” said Desmond. ”My thanks also go out to all the little people who were hurt in our stores. They lost a lot of wages because we had to cut back because our business has been down so badly.” — AP/AOL News

Of course, it is likely this is the first case ever where the finger actually fingered the perpetrator. Since it’s Friday, I thought you might enjoy reading about some ridiculous lawsuits. Most of these come from Citizens Against Lawsuit Abuse (CALA) via Duhaime Law. Ultimately, we all end up paying for these litigious idiots. Enjoy!

*An inmate filed a $5 million lawsuit against himself (he claimed that he violated his own civil rights by getting arrested) — then asked the state to pay because he has no income in jail. He said, “I want to pay myself $5 million dollars, but ask the state to pay it on my behalf since I can’t work and am a ward of the state.” The judge was not impressed by his ingenuity, and dismissed the suit as frivolous.

*A writer was sued for $60 million dollars after writing a book about a convicted Orange County serial killer. Although the inmate is on death row, he claimed that he was innocent in all 16 murders, so the characterization of him as a serial killer was false, misleading and “defamed his good name”. In addition, he claimed those falsehoods would cause him to be “shunned by society and unable to find decent employment” once he returned to private life. The case was thrown out in a record 46 seconds, but only after $30,000 in legal fees were incurred by the writer’s publisher.

*A woman in Israel is suing a TV station and its weatherman for $1,000 after he predicted a sunny day and it rained. The woman claims the forecast caused her to leave home lightly dressed. As a result, she caught the flu, missed 4 days of work, spent $38 on medication and suffered stress. (Editor’s note: At least the US isn’t the only country with money-grubbing fools.)

*A surfer sued another surfer for “taking his wave.” The case was ultimately dismissed because they were unable to put a price on “pain and suffering” endured by watching someone ride the wave that was “intended for you.”

*A woman was playing golf and hit a shot which ricocheted off railroad tracks that run through the course. The ball hit her in the nose and she won $40,000 because the golf course had a “free lift” rule (this allows golfers to toss balls which land near the rails to the other side). The woman alleged that because the course allowed a free lift, they were, in effect, acknowledging the rails to be a hazard.

*A New Jersey man sued McDonald’s for injuries he sustained in an auto accident with one of their customers. He claimed that the customer who hit him did so after spilling the contents of his McDonald’s chocolate shake onto his lap while reaching for his fries. He alleged that McDonald’s sold their customer food knowing he would consume it while driving and without announcing or affixing a warning to the effect “don’t eat and drive.” The court concluded that McDonald’s had no duty to warn customers of obvious things which they should expect to know, but refused McDonald’s request for attorney’s fees stating that the plaintiff’s attorney was “creative, imaginative and he shouldn’t be penalized for that.” This case was in the court system for three years, underwent appellate court review and cost McDonald’s over $10,000. (From American Tort Reform Association [ATRA])

* A woman who suffered minor injuries when she was hit by a train while walking along railroad tracks is suing the railroad for more than $30,000 because she says the railroad didn’t warn people that trains were likely to travel on the tracks she was walking along. (ATRA/Associated Press Newswires, November 5, 2004)

* A Florida woman, who was taken off an airplane in Dallas and asked to pull a vibrating sex toy out of one of her checked bags, has sued Delta Airlines citing public humiliation. She claims she had to hold it up for visible viewing. She was then allowed to repack and return to her seat for the flight back to Florida.
-The Dallas Morning News, 7/28/02 (Editor’s note: Remember the old slogan “Delta is ready when you are?” We’ve found a new meaning for it. Sorry, couldn’t help myself.)



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One Response to “The Finger Told the Tale”

  1. Big Dog says:

    I am confused. I thought KY Fried Chicken was finger lickin’ good.